Life can be lame...

Life can be so lame that you just want to quit. I have been feeling that this huge ball is going to drop on my life and I am just going to let it! I can't seem to get out of this downward spiral of emotions. I can't help but feel that I need to stop feeling this way, but can't seem to make the best choices for myself. Now if someone who is wise and knows what I should be doing comes along and sees me in my slump,,, do you think I should listen to what they say? Well yes I do. I know Jesus wants me to make the choice to be joyful, not blue right now and I know that I need to look at what is true, pure, noble and praiseworthy, but how do I do that when all I see is myself and how I am being affected in this new life adventure of ministry. I am so selfish and want to be back to my old life. . . . . . . . . . . Old life... homeschool able to stay at home (not working outside the home) Avon $ was mine I could call Paul anytime of the day without feeling that I am in the way able to do things with my friends go to Bible study try to get laundry done during anyday that I need to just plain had $ . . . . . . . . . . new life..... not able to stay home put girls in 'real' school Avon and CtK $ is for family needs can't call Paul anytime (dont' want to bother) no wed. Bible study never can get alundry done no $ at all can't sit with Paul at church no more date night my life is now under a microscope enemy attacks are huge Paul loves being at church (good for him, bad for me) have to keep my mouth shut girls are now PK's I'm a pastor's wife can't control my emotions I'm stupid and can't do anything I should just quit and live in a hole in the mountian Why do I have to feel so down!!!!!!!!!!@!!@